Marriage Stories

Featured Couple: Barrett and Jennifer

“When a wife starts a sentence with ‘we need to talk,’ her husband will typically get defensive.  What starts as a simple desire to sharpen the relationship can quickly escalate into an unproductive conflict with someone being the ‘bad guy’”.  Barrett and Jennifer have found a way to bring up topics in a marriage without causing a quarrel.  “We occasionally read a relationship book together,” Barrett explains.  “This is an excellent way to initiate profitable interaction between you and your spouse.  The book becomes the ‘bad guy’ by bringing up the essential things that need to be dealt with in a growing marriage.”

Barrett and Jennifer reveal their perfect formula for reading a book together:  To maximize the effectiveness of a good read, they suggest that couples share a book.  The husband should read a chapter first and underline or highlight those things that spark his interest or capture his perspective.  Then, he passes it on to his wife to read.  That way, she not only gets a general insight into men, but she also gets specific insight into her husband.  After they discuss it for a while, she reads a chapter the same way, marking the book up accordingly before passing it on to him.  This is a great way to get talking about relevant things that you never even thought to talk about!

Books are not the only “bad guys” out there.  Seminars, tapes and CDs work just as well!  All of these vehicles act as impartial third parties who can bring up topics and situations that are common in marriages.  Obviously, if you are reading this book, you will learn the value of a fresh perspective.  How can you and your spouse get the most out of these programs and activities?